10 Special Things to Say to Yourself

Understand that sometimes I have to walk away and move in order for others to enjoy the view.

I am an optimist. I do believe that the best is always yet to come in my life. But being optimistic is sometimes foolish and difficult as Peter Ustinov once put it.  Sometimes a personal goal, obsession and drive, a particular dream, ambition can create frustration. Also the same happens with the lack of a clear drive, focus or decision. In this landscape things will probably become sometimes too intense, blurry and dramatic. So what to do? The important is to get out of our own spot. Stop the maze of thoughts. Take sometime to be alone, walk, go to a garden, forest. Look at a view, lose yourself in the view to the sea. Get out of the pressure zone, stressful dark clouds.

Once we are destined to live out our lives in the prison of our mind, our duty is to furnish it well. Peter Ustinov

One needs to respect our own need for space and others territory. Somehow understand the balance in a learning process. Remember bigger values. Most of the times one knows how to behave if one gets out of the hot spot, the hole of tension. Most of the tempests come when one is tired and not focus enough. Nevertheless wild waves are part of the process of navigating. Going through the sea looking for some kind of new destinations is part of a quest where one will find crisis, tension, and repeated crashes. But is not that life? The magic moments are the ones when somehow I understand how deal with change, disruption, sorrow. And the poetic moments come when I achieve something that matters, not when one it is in the comfort zone.

Any personal drive makes each one of us advance further but sometimes a strong energy, or extra capacity of doing things can also hurt other people. There are a lot of different ways to look at things. Not just my or your way. So it is necessary some kind of balance. Also some special understanding how to communicate inside. Moreover how to correctly manage the inner language. I am sure that is probably the biggest challenge, without a positive language and focus our internal set up gets messy and affects the rest of the body and its actions.

Enjoy each small thing. They are much more precious content that the eye can see.

Understand the complexity of the mysteries of life is something that is a long term voyage. My main concern by now is how I can be more thankfully with what I have and give space to others. Also how can I respect, give a positive distance to the other, you.

This makes me look critically inward at the alignment between my real drives and motivations. Thus checking against the reality of my actions. If I want to improve and optimise my language, I need to cooperate and change and get out of my comfort zone. Write and repeat no more blame, guilty and judging. Make sure I do.

I have no doubt that my own thoughts and insecurities are the only obstacles that stop me from being happy. Everyone has problems, stress in their lives, the effort is how to deal with that burden. And I need to ask myself continuously if I’m practicing what I preach.

So how can I avoid negative expressions, words or phrases that paralyse me and push me to negative emotions or perceptions? When alone thinking and walking I ask myself what to I need to do to have a special life? How can I make an effort to express my emotions in a constructive and kind way. How can I avoid some repetitive no go cycles and focus in my real dreams, while understanding others around me? And move with my energy and drive.

This is no fantasy island. I do believe more and more in the power of changing the way one thinks. I understand through my own life how my life improves massively when I focus in a self developing meta language. And if I can do it with myself through continuous effort that can be done as well with other people around me. It is not easy and needs continuous efforts. However if we support each other and go for it every day, every moment. Precisely when we are more afraid, or sometimes down these are the moments one can achieve new stages of development and therefore reach goals. In these harsh moments I get close to my humanity on a personal, emotional, professional level understanding how my ambition and its visualisation can be turned reality.

Of course this does not happen in any fairy tale story, but in reality, in each minute and hour. And it takes discipline of changing from an old me to a more open me. It comes with a lot of effort, discipline. I have to repeat and learn and not be afraid of failure or not reaching the top of the mountain. Some days are just better than others. And each day has different music, challenges and crisis, but also special moments and things.

Life is indeed a wonderful adventure if we live it all, without getting stuck in the labyrinth of unmanageable emotions, lack of security, need to be on the spotlight. Specially when we feel sorry for ourselves or something that happened to us… When we have difficulty to forgive, to let it go.

So I decided to write a small list of the 10 Special Things to Say to Yourself (myself):

  1. I love myself, I forgive myself and I am proud of what I am.
  2. Yes whatever will be will be, even all the science and tech in the world could not avoid Titanic to sink!
  3. All my flaws, my failures are there to teach me something, even if they are painful they will be helpful someday.
  4. Understand that sometimes I have to walk away and move in order for others to enjoy the view.
  5. When I am hungry? Perhaps I should walk for a while and let my brain relax a bit. 
  6. Maybe, sometimes I should stop, breathe and eat something.
  7. There’s nothing wrong here that a great smile cannot heal or inspire and relax. 
  8. Well done all the small things you thought you could not do.
  9. OK baby! Less is not necessary less it can be more!  
  10. Enjoy each small thing. They are much more precious that the eye can see.
Keep remembering tomorrow is always another day! The best philosophy is to be honest and it starts with what you say to yourself.
The point of living, and of being an optimist, is to be foolish enough to believe the best is yet to come. Peter Ustinov
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Comments

Hi! Good list!
… ou melhor, uma boa maneira, de evitar contar até 100 sem dúvida! Espero que esteja tudo bem contigo!
Um forte abraço…

Joe Omansky

Denis,
This is an excellent list of tenets to remind oneself. We all have flaws and it is great to accept and understand them. Learning to enjoy each and every moment and to know that some of them will be challenging and some of them ecstatic. So great to know you.
Joe